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About the Editor in Chief.
Writing on walls and drawing was a huge hobby for my friend Steve and I during our high school years. When I went to college at Kutztown University of PA, I created a website called "Redzone" which was a combination of Angelfire webpages linked together. The site displayed pictures of Philadelphia graffiti. It was a hilariously bad website that had a great reputation as the biggest and best site for Philly graffiti. It was eventually linked to from the best graffiti site in the world known as Art Crimes. I eventually majored in professional writing and it seems as though I've combined my major with my hobby and turned it into an extremely fun business.
And here we are...
I'm an intense coffee drinker who loves hilarious content, still plays video games, and has a strange combination of music interests. I'm also married to a sweet wife and have a really weird daughter. I'm a Philly guy who was raised by young parents. I have a three cool siblings who are equally amazing and annoying (I'm the big brother, I have to call you annoying, even if it's not true), but all lovable and have given me some of the best memories of my life.
When we were in our early teen years, my brothers and I were video game addicts. Every rainy day we would play NHL on Sega Genesis. My brothers would curse whenever they lost to that epic one-timer goal and our parents thought it was me. I'm the oldest, so I had to be the only one in the house who could yell "MOTHERF*CKER" at a 3-2 loss of the Buffalo Sabres beating the Chicago Blackhawks or Detroit Redwings. Nope. That wasn't me. I had no reason to swear since I won. Regardless, parents would blame me and give me that sorta timeout (didn't really happen), and I was sick of taking the blame for crimes I didn't commit against the household rules. These little pricks were fully capable of swearing like drunken sailors at 8 and 10 years old. I set up a tape recorder next to the TV, gathered evidence, and presented a case to my lawyer Mom and human resource Dad.
I won my case but my brothers didn't get punished. The first thing I said was "MOTHERF*CKER!" This is probably the time in my life where I subconsciously began telling them to "read a book once in a while" - Ask my brothers about how I told them to read a book once. Go ahead.
A great memory I have with my extremely smart, sometimes levelheaded, and knock out beautiful Sister is when she would wear my baseball caps, hang out the window of my crappy Kia Optima and yell "yo wassup dawg" to strangers. She said it in a cute six year old voice which made it so memorable. It wasn't until just now that I realize letting a six year old hang out the window of a moving car was preposterously f*cking unsafe for a kid to do. Didn't think about that back then, didn't think much at all then, but she definitely could've flown out the window a few times. Not sure how I'd explain that to my entire family or the local news. I guess I shouldn't mention the time that I let her drive and she almost crashed into a dumpster behind a public school. Not sure why I thought a kid who can't see over the wheel could see the dumpster she almost destroyed. What were we thinking?
I have about 900 parents because I'm half adopted and my parents are divorced and half remarried and my wife's parents are divorced and half remarried. My Dad isn't technically my Dad, but he's been the only father figure in my life and the only name he'll ever go by to me is "DAD" and once in a while when we're trading jokes via his new iPhone - "beef cake." He's awesome and had I listened to him years ago, rather than being a stupidly stubborn mid 20 year old, I'd probably be a millionaire right now. At the very least, a hundred-thousand-aire like I used to be. Even as a grown up, which I barely feel like, and having my own child on the way, I still look in his direction when I need sound advice, even if it's something that my 20 year old self wouldn't have wanted to hear. There's a lot of times I wish I was a better person ten years ago. I can't change that, but I can change moving forward. I credit Dad with changing the way I think and helping me grow as a person who strives to succeed and always be better.
My Mom is pretty and cool. She likes to text people at 6:44 AM about random things, spell it wrong because she's not wearing her glasses and can't see that auto-correct as demolished her writing (it's not AC, it's YOU!), and has more energy than people on crack. I don't know if she ever goes to bed, but she's a ball of fire. She goes on four mile walks when she's bored and I'm sitting here eating pizza while she calls, feeling bad about my gluttonous devouring.
She's a breast cancer survivor and I still remember the day and location I received the phone call when she was first diagnosed. I was driving south on I-95 on my way to a lacrosse game, tears pouring out my eyes as I tried to compose myself. I couldn't even talk during the game. I couldn't do anything, but if someone asked what's up - "I'm good." I should've let it all out. It's been quite the battle, but after a double mastectomy, she's survived it for 5+ years. She still has some minor battles, but she's strong and resorts to relaxing with a good Lifetime or Hallmark movie when she needs to decompress. I credit Mom for giving me strength to endure lifes battles, challenges, and ability carry weight without faltering
In 2014 I married a really weird girl from New Jersey. She's a combination of weird, beautiful, intelligent, and I don't know how she was still available. Even more strange - I still don't know why she said yes when I proposed on South Street in Philadelphia.
She opened my chest, stole my heart, and I hope she keeps it forever. Even though she leaves her snack wrappers and drink containers all over the house, the amount of weird love that comes from her would be unobtainable with anyone else.
Now she's all knocked up with our sweet little baby nut and we don't have an instruction manual for this baby, but we'll figure it out. There's people more clueless than us and they figure it out, so I'm confident we will be OK.
My wife is the first best thing to happen to my life. I think getting her pregnant took is a close second. This baby nut already knows love, and it will get a dose of tough love from me while my wife provides the sensitive side. We're going to be a great good cop/bad cop team!
She doesn't know how much I value her existence and how deep in my body the love goes for her. I always need to know she's OK because it's one of the few things that give me comfort.
Her family is amazing and I'm glad her parents got a little frisky back in the day. I wish we all lived closer so we can spend more time together. If only I could bring in a few million with my websites, then maybe I could buy us all houses on the same street and have family dinner every Sunday. The things you can only dream of...
This is our wedding song, but it's not exactly our song. We really like the Lumineers Hey Ho song, but it didn't seem like a wedding dance would've worked too well. Then again, I partied so hard at our reception that I puked on our wedding night anyway, so I don't think a weird wedding dance would've mattered so much.
My spare time consists of eating, drinking coffee, playing Xbox, writing for blogs covering news, viral media, and whatever I think of that I think readers would enjoy. (for myself and others).
I love video games. It's my hobby away from my hobby of writing. It's my way to unwind and decompress, even though sometimes playing that stupid Destiny game is stressful in itself when you have bad teammates (called Smurfs or Blueberries), but it's just a game and I know that.
I used to down mixed drinks like it was my job and pass out in my underwear on my gaming chair and drool on my headset while my game character was walking into a wall. My adult drink used to be Turkey Hill mint tea and Sweet Mint Tea vodka, then it was random beers, then it became Honey Whisky mixed with Jamaican Ginger soda - a recipe my Wife's cool Uncle introduced me to.
I didn't think I'd ever not want to drink and party, but now I can't really stand it. I don't like being in loud places unless I'm completely hammered first. I need a serious pregame if I'm going to tolerate a loud crowd.
Nowadays I may have one drink a month. Maybe two if there's a family event or a holiday. I value my time awake and coherent more than I do getting drunk. Am I a grown up? Was I miserable before and needed to drink to feel better about myself? Am I finally happy enough to live my life sober and honestly enjoy it? Make no mistake, a good stiff drink once in a while is a great thing, especially when you feel like celebrating - but lately I just want to stay awake for 90 hours in a row and I drink tons of coffee. Weird, right?
Songs I like that aren't by NWA, because NWA is awesome, but these might be more appropriate for an about page.